Online dating is the act of searching for a romantic partner on the internet through either an app or a website. In 2022, according to Pew Research, one in three adults in America have used online dating at least once in their lifetime to find a partner. Online dating has become the second most popular way to find a significant other, largely in part, to the rise in dating apps and the ability to simply swipe left or right.
Matchmaking using technology is not as new as it seems. According to the article “Love at First Swipe: The Evolution of Online Dating,” the first computer-based matching service was invented in 1965 by two Harvard students looking for love. It started with a 75-question survey and a $3 fee for applicants. Over 90,000 people signed up for the service and the concept of computer-based matchmaking was born. Since then, using technology to meet people has only become more common. According to the article, 70 percent of Americans use some form of social media, and one-quarter of the country is online most of the day.
In 2020, my ex-husband and I separated after a seven-year relationship; we eventually divorced almost a year after we first separated. I hadn’t entered the dating scene in almost a decade, and I was absolutely terrified. Dating post-quarantine was hard. It wasn’t safe to go to social functions to meet someone, so many naturally turned to online dating, even if they had never experienced it before. Fortunately, I had, and I freely admit it. I met my ex-husband, randomly, on a website called Plenty of Fish. I had recently moved back to my hometown of Vernon, Texas, in early 2014 after twelve years away, and didn’t know anyone in the area anymore other than family.
After divorce, I was a little wary of dating again because I had only had bad experiences, but I was willing to put myself out there. I went through all the stages of an anxiety attack. Was I too old to date? Am I too set in my ways to start over? Do I even have time to date?
I joined Facebook Date (which launched in 2019 but didn’t become popular until 2020). After only meeting scammers, I put the app aside and decided to take a break from dating. During that time, I randomly matched with Jason, my current boyfriend. However, I told him that I wasn’t interested in dating, but we could be friends and we added each other on Snapchat. After that, we talked a few times a week and developed a friendship. Several months later, he asked me out on a date, but I was still wary of online dating. I eventually said yes to a date and I’m glad I did. Next week we are going to celebrate our six-month anniversary.
My takeaway:
In 2022 we should all be cautious over meeting someone online.
Always talk and get to know someone first and then agree to meet in person.
You are never too old to start over. I started my life over at 36 from scratch and I feel like I’m a better person for it.
Don’t let anxiety get to you.
You are enough, and if you are still looking, don’t force it because it will naturally happen.
A note of caution: Since the pandemic, online dating scams have been on the rise. If you are online dating, be wary of scammers. The scammers that I have met during my time online dating usually pretend to be in the military looking for a connection overseas or a businessperson that travels a lot. These people are charming and full of compliments. They are also usually way younger or way older. If you pay attention to the way they write, you can usually tell a scammer by their grammar. Their grammar is near perfect but there are often unusual changes in tenses. According to the article “Heartbreakers, dream fakers, money takers: Romance scams are rising,” romance scams have increased 197% in 2020 compared to 2019 which has resulted in millions of dollars lost.
I want to hear from our readers: What are your experiences dating online? Has anyone had to recently start over in the dating game? What is your advice? Let’s continue the conversation on our Facebook Group!
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