What Makes a Great Love Story, and Why Do We Care?

 

Next week is Valentine’s Day, and although many people are put out by the “manufactured” holiday as an excuse to sell cards and candy, I have a soft spot for all the romantic hoopty-doo and think it’s a great excuse to revel in some of the sweet stuff that comes around this time of year. Maybe it’s because I read too many romance stories when I was younger (mostly tragic ones)...I get caught up in the whole idea of a special day just for love and lovers. And that brings us to the topic of this week’s podcast…The Greatest Love Story.

I don’t want to get into a whole list of my favorite love stories today. We covered a lot of that on the podcast, and true to form, as soon as the mics turned off, I thought of a whole lot more, but I’m intrigued by why we relish romantic stories so much, and what makes a good one. So I did a little digging to find out. Apparently, it all comes down to chemistry.

In her article, “Why Do We Love Stories”, Harrie Truscott notes that through brain imaging, neuroscientists have been able to demonstrate that our brains “light up” when we are told a story, and that it goes beyond the normal “language processing” region that is affected when we take in new information – the sensory cortex and the motor cortex are triggered as well, just as if the person had witnessed the story first-hand. In a Harvard Review article by Paul J. Zak titled, “Why Your Brain Loves Good Storytelling,” the author reveals how he and a team of scientists discovered that stories caused our brains to release oxytocin, the chemical responsible for feelings of empathy, bonding, and even love. It’s the same chemical that helps mothers bond with their babies and lovers to one another. Zak’s research went further to demonstrate that a compelling story produced more oxytocin, deepening the connection between the listener/viewer with the characters to the extent that they actually shared the emotions of the characters and that they continued mimicking those feelings and behaviors after the story ends.

So what makes a story compelling? Zak notes that a story must sustain the listener/viewer’s attention and that to do that, an element of tension must be introduced in the narrative. This explains why we are so fascinated not by the love-at-first-sight-then-happily-ever-after kind of story but rather with the tragic story. The story where miscommunication, meddlesome characters, and calamitous plot devices keep the lovers apart and interfere with the progression of their relationship. We can relate to that. And the chemicals in our brains remind us that we are all human and that it could happen to us, too.

So, the next time someone catches you weeping at something you saw on TV or read in a book, remind them that it’s just chemistry and your brain was designed to make you react that way.

Don’t forget to join us Wednesday for the podcast, where we’ll share some of our favorite love stories and debate about a few, too! Then join us over on our MMC Chat group and tell us about your greatest love story favorite.

Tell Your Story

November starts the real preparations for December Daily. I’m not going to tell you about that project yet again, but there are some good takeaways from projects like that. Since it is also National Novel Writing Month, I want to use the novel-writing theme to talk about documenting family stories, but instead of doing paper crafting, I want to focus on writing stories and using digital aids to create books you and your loved ones will treasure for many years to come. 

I will mention several of these in the podcast tomorrow, but I wanted to share a little bit more about them here. I think I’ve mentioned Becky Higgin’s My Modern Story multiple times in the last year of podcasts. This is a wonderfully helpful method for documenting family histories and personal stories of all kinds. She created this project as a heartfelt attempt to help others, especially non-scrapbookers, find ways to quickly and efficiently preserve those important memories before they are gone. The workshop is free and can be completed quickly in one evening or an afternoon. It utilizes her Project Life app and allows you to add stories or text of any kind, really, along with photos. It’s so simple and she has great ideas for where to find those stories, like taking posts directly from social media, etc. I’ve used this app multiple times to document family stories, and I plan to eventually convert the stories I’ve created there into a family history book – the pages can be used to create stunning, hard-bound books either by downloading the pages directly or by ordering through the app. There are, of course, some in-app purchases, which are optional, and you can make your storytelling as simple or as complex as you like.

Along those lines, for those of you who like the look of traditional scrapbook pages, but don’t have the patience, money, or time, there are lots of options for creating fun, colorful, and artistic pages digitally. Many of the major scrapbooking design companies now offer digital versions of their products, which you can use with Photoshop and other applications to create beautiful scrapbooks right on your phone or computer. In fact, the aforementioned Project Life app can recreate the look of traditional or pocket-based scrapbook pages by using digital papers and other elements right in the app (in-app purchases available). Once you’ve created your pages, you can download them to print at home, order prints from the app, or convert them into a bound book as described above.

And speaking of bound books, don’t forget that online photo retailers like Shutterfly, Snapfish, Persnickety Prints, and Amazon Photos also create lovely bound books to preserve your family memories. You simply create your pages at home on your phone or computer, upload them to the print retailer of your choice, arrange the pages as you like, and order…simple as that. Most of them also offer an in-app method for designing your pages, where all you do is drag and drop your photos and text. This is a fantastic way to document those family stories, with or without photos and/or text. What’s even better is that you can order multiple copies of a book to give to other family members. Remember Christmas? It’s less than two months away….

One last word about documenting stories…and yes, it does involve December Daily. December Daily Prep Day is coming up on Saturday, November 12. This is a day that many participants look forward to as we spend our day online with the DD community getting our supplies ready and pre-making pages so we are ready to document when December 1 rolls around. There are often tips for organizing, beautiful page ideas, lessons of all kinds, and, of course, a lot of camaraderie as we all start to get excited about not just December Daily, but the holiday season as a whole. You can find out more about DD Prep Day in the links below.

Whether you scrapbook or not, celebrate Christmas or other holidays, or just spend the fall and winter months hibernating in your hidey-hole, this is a great time to start thinking about the stories and the legacy you want to leave behind. Do you have cool stories about your ancestors? Do you have more recent memories that you don’t want to forget? Or do you have a trauma that needs to be brought forward into the light of day so you can heal and move on? Documenting your stories is a great way to do it, and the options for how you get started are truly endless. If you need more help, or encouragement, or have questions, please feel free to email me or comment below…I’d love to help you get started telling your stories.

• Ali Edwards - December Daily
• Just Write - also at AliEdwards.com
• My Modern Story by Becky Higgins